Get the Best of Being Miserable

Misery is the cold wind that keeps the covers up too long, the flow of tears dripping on your broken heart. It lurks through the lives of the rich and the poor. Moving slowly, creeping and crawling to the weak and unsuspecting. The battle is not a hard one. It usually succeeds with silent attacks, and stays beyond the treaty. Consuming, depressing, and addicting it feeds on us. The chefs that prepare this hearty feast are me, you, him, and her.

Her life is perfect because she was born with a silver spoon in her mouth, and I with a tarnished one stuck to my nose. He has a dream house, car, and wife in his perfect life, but mine is shrouded with misfortune. My dreams will never come true. You can’t tell me they will, and yours won’t come true either. We can’t rely on anything because it never works as intended. Take marriage for instance, it fail 50 % of the time. What’s the point?

The bottom line of it is, that silver-spooned girl got shipped around to boarding schools, and never really saw her parents or felt their love. That guy living the perfect life, well, his perfect wife is having an affair, and he unknowingly foots the bill. Oh, and about dreams not coming true, just ask Martin Luther King Jr., Nancy Kerrigan, or Walt Disney what they think, and I am sure you will find other opinions. Look at the marital statistic upside down; that means 50% of marriages succeed.

As you can see, I used extreme examples. He or she may have a wonderful life, but he or she may have worked hard to achieve it.

Don’t sweat the small stuff, don’t judge a book by its cover, and sure maybe the grass is always greener. Can I throw anymore clichés at you to prove my point? Sweating less saves shirts, you might actually read a fantastic book, and maybe your grass just needs a little fertilizer.
The next time you find yourself plagued with poor me syndrome, take three steps back. Inhale for five seconds, and think (or say out loud depending where you are), "such is the way things are." Then exhale for five seconds; do this three times (it may require 9, 12, or 15 times in extreme cases).You should notice that each time you will say it a little slower; a little calmer. Now you will subconsciously accept that there is nothing you can do to reverse the situation, and handle it accordingly, maybe even pleasantly.

As soon as possible, grab a piece of paper and a pen (if you’re in the middle of a battle with the produce manager or your boss, this can wait until you get home). Write down five positive things you have in your life currently. EVERYONE has them! These items can be as small your dog that excitedly greets you at the door every night, to your health having never failed you. I’m willing to bet that once you get going, you will fill an entire page. Once this is done, the next time you encounter those gifts, they will be more meaningful, last a few minutes longer, and become your security.

The next step is to be genuinely happy for other people! He gets a promotion; assume he deserves it. She gets engaged; assume she is marrying for love. This world is stuffed with gigantic, yet sensitive egos, which love a little stroke every now and again. Come on…admit it…yours does too. Well, you get what you give. If you haven’t called them, then why should they have called you?

Listen to your friends, remember important events in their lives, and then TELL them how happy you are for them, or that you just happened to be thinking of them. Run through the open doors of sincere love and valued friendship; slam the doors to accidently losing touch and unnecessary loneliness.

Quick tips to banish misery:

Abolish negative thoughts.
Never say can’t; that’s just code for won’t.
Don’t take yourself so seriously.
Search for positive quotes that motivate you, and post them wherever you can see them.
Exercise! It releases natural happy chemicals, called endorphins.
Surround yourself with positive people; avoid becoming misery’s company.
Smile at him, her, and everyone!
Build a bridge and get over it! (Sometimes we need a little tough love. You are the enforcer. )

Please keep in mind these are not techniques for severe or clinical depression. Only a doctor can be the judge of that course of treatment. However, in combination with the doctor’s orders, these tips can certainly boost your success.

Follow these rules, and I promise you, you will see a difference. Life will seem easier, color will be brighter, and the cool crisp wind will make you sit up and breathe deeper ready for a new day.